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NFR Cops, Cops, Cops! Speed Traps Everywhere!

2K views 26 replies 13 participants last post by  Mike Etgen 
#1 ·
I can't travel anywhere because of traffic jams and if you get to the bottom of these jams, you will find it's all the cop cars, marked and unmarked, that are at fault.
We have no money over here on the Peninsula. Tim Iman stole it all and no one except me votes for property taxes to sort of hold things together. We are still trimming "Fat."
But to keep the lights on the cops are writing tickets as fast as possible. We have one ridiculous change of speed limits after another. You can't set your cruize control. And with each speed reduction you miss, you get the local Gestapo fast on your butt. And these ticky babies cost hundreds.
I have never had a ticket im 66 years until about 3 months ago in Port Hadlock where the speed limit drops from 40 to 25 MPH in a New York second.
Then, last night, here comes Sparky after me again. But he lets me slide after I tell him the sad but true story of having to deal with my wife's poor health.
So, I'm tired of bitching here, but I was wondering if you guys over on the mainland are having the same trouble. Is the state being supported by traffic tickets? Do you worry when you go fishing about little town police and country sheriffs? Do you have traps? Unmarked cars?
Bob, the Damn I Thought, When I Saw All The Lights, Must Be A Robbery Somewhere:reallymad
 
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#27 ·
New River Mike

First, let me say to Bob that I did not interpret his original post as a call to anarchy. And I do feel Fortuna
responded appropriately to a situation that sounds very much like entrapment.

Second, I endorse the idea of a Fortuna for Governor campaign. You may need to touch up the picture just a bit so that the PETA folks can see that the fish is plainly having a good laugh with you and is not being harmed in any way. Or, substitute a carp. Of course, a carp would take two hands.

Last, I would suggest that Bob has the basic idea about what a Press Secretary should say, but needs to develop a broader and more colorful range of responses...

Press: Did Governor Fortuna say thus and so?
Bob: His original statement was so distorted by the liberal press that his true words have been irrevocably lost amongst the babble of talking heads, idealoques, academics, and slaves to special interests.

Press: Did Governor Fortuna not say he would never do thus and so?
Bob: Governor Fortuna has once again had his positions distorted by the enemies of all true Washingtonians. These constant distortions are making it increasingly difficult for any but the steadiest hands to keep the ship of state on course. I would add that a true Washingtonian would never even ask such a question.

Press: Did not the Governor say he would endorse that bill?
Bob: "That bill,as YOU call it, is nothing more or less that a call to anarchy and is an affront to all hard-working Washingtonians. The governor has always stood squarely behind the idea that Washingtonians should decide what is best for Washington. He has no idea what the legislature is thinking about in the way of an agenda, but will listen to any reasonable ideas put forth. Regrettably, those ideas have yet to come.

Press: What about Governor Fortuna's speeding ticket?
Bob: Thank you for asking that question. Governor Fortuna is grieved that Washington is racked with crime, a result of the previous governor's unwillingness to deal with the enemies of a peaceful and harmonious Washington. Today we are announcing an ambitious proposal to put more cops on the street and give our courts the power to put the bad guys away for good.

Press: How does the governor view the wild steelhead controversy?
Bob: I'm going to step aside and let the Governor answer that question perosnally...
Governor: What exactly is a steelhead and why is this fish laughing at me?

Damn, this is easy!


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